Strange Turn of Events
by blue mood blue
Summary: Sebastian's had a long day, and a crisis in the apartment is about to make it longer. (Same 'verse as Unbearable Living Conditions; can be read alone) Drabble collection - prompts accepted.
1. Phone Call

Phone Call

Summary: Sebastian keeps calling Kurt, and Kurt thinks it's a little weird.

* * *

Sebastian was calling Kurt all of the time, and it was kind of weird.

It started with a several-second taunt one evening after Kurt got back from work, exhausted. "Hey Hummel, heard short and sexy finally got rid of you. Wanna have some fun tonight? I know a few guys who might be fooled by your lady-face." Kurt hung up on him with a growl and stomped around and burned the vegetarian stir-fry that night, to Rachel's dismay.

The insults didn't stop until after a chance encounter between the two at a café in which they somehow ended up with each other's coffee. Kurt remained convinced that the mix-up was done on purpose by Sebastian until almost a month later when he checked his voicemail one afternoon. "I drank your stupid coffee and now I can't figure out what they hell you even ordered. I've been trying different coffee orders for a month because it was fucking good, but the barista is no help and I just want to drink coffee that's drinkable again, so call me back and tell me your damn order." Kurt had spent a good, long while thinking over how soon to call back. He'd left it another couple of weeks, then told the other boy to order the holiday special. That wasn't his order, but it was hilarious to hear Sebastian cursing loudly in public about how the peppermint was burning his taste buds when he called back.

The calls didn't get truly strange until a drunken phone call one Saturday night after a few more random coffee shop encounters when Sebastian confessed that he liked staring at Kurt's eyes. "I just... they're oceans, Kurt, and they're always moving around and I swear I could stare at them for hours."  
"You're drunk, Sebastian," Kurt helpfully replied.  
"But it's true! You know that time that we met for coffee?"  
"We do that pretty often now."  
"It was... it was the guy with the jacket, the poet. He said that thing about the ocean..."  
"Wait, you mean that hobo we saw _outside_ of the coffee shop? The one shouting Coleridge at everyone who passed?"  
"He said that thing about the ocean and it was completely true! Your eyes are just like that!"  
"...He was talking about glowing snakes in the water, Sebastian. What are you trying to say?"  
The conversation didn't improve much from there, and it took a week of cold-shouldering from Kurt for Sebastian to apologize for the insult that was supposed to be a compliment and that he didn't even remember butchering and the subsequent word vomit that inadvertently led to the insult of Kurt's clothes, hair, family, and past relationships. The apology reeked of insincerity, and somehow it devolved into a public shouting-match, thrown coffee, and the promise that they really didn't need the other in their lives. That led to a month of silence that might have continued indefinitely. Kurt got another drunken call, though, this time from a boy back home, and it still hurt maybe a little more than it should have. Despite her misgivings, Rachel called Sebastian to come and fix her friend, and he showed up with cheesecake, no questions asked. The two didn't really talk out their problems that night, but when Kurt fell asleep on Sebastian's shoulder, Rachel was pretty sure they'd be okay.  
The calls were more frequent after that, with lots of banter and snark. The whole thing might have been pleasant, even, if not for the awkward complication of Kurt actually starting to enjoy the phone calls - look forward to them, even. One night, when Sebastian was loopy with lack of sleep while preparing for a final, Rachel even caught Kurt _smiling_. It was bizarre.  
What was more bizarre was when Sebastian started asking Kurt to go places with him. The d-word was never used, but Kurt and Rachel spent long hours analyzing the situation and what happened on these "outings." Kurt was pretty sure they were dating. He was absolutely sure when the two went to a club one night and Sebastian deflected everyone else who flirted with him, as well as everyone who approached Kurt.  
"Bas, is there some particular reason that you keep telling guys that I'm not interested?" There was a very clear tone of "you'd better give me the right answer, Smythe, or I'm going to make your life hell" in Kurt's voice.  
Sebastian, easily catching the tone and paying about as much attention to it as usual, raised an eyebrow. "You came here with _me_, Kurt. Don't tell me you're looking for a random hook-up?"  
"Maybe I am," he challenged. "I guess that depends."  
Sebastian was glaring at him. "On what you can snag?"  
"On whether or not I'm here with my boyfriend."  
Sebastian froze and Kurt immediately tensed. Maybe that hadn't been the best way to ask. Of course it hadn't been – he hadn't even asked anything and it sounded like some kind of demand, and Sebastian wasn't good with demands. He was never going to go for this... but the other boy uncrossed his arms and leaned closer, and in the next second they were kissing.

Kurt's heart skipped and started racing. Sebastian tasted like the alcohol he'd already had and a little bit like cinnamon but mostly just like Sebastian, intoxicating and maddening and _so close_.

Too soon he pulled back, smiling without the usual hint of smirk. "You couldn't have just said something, huh?"

"I don't remember you saying anything either."

"Yeah, we're pretty good at not talking." They spent a lot of time not talking after that, memorizing each other instead.

The phone calls were sickening after that, according to Rachel. It was the giggling, which was almost constant; she hadn't heard that much giggling from Kurt in a long time. It was also the gentle teasing, and the not-so-gentle teasing, and the unending inside jokes. The most sickening was how frequently she had to run out of the room when Kurt used that certain tone of voice because she _did not _need any more of _those _images of her best friend, _please. _ She didn't want to think of Kurt with his boyfriend _like that _any more than he wanted to think of her with _her _boyfriend.

Things were going fantastically when Sebastian screwed up. They'd decided to attend a fashion exhibit at the museum – mostly at Kurt's insistence – and watching Kurt getting excited over the displays made the other boy blurt out a certain set of words that he'd been hoping to say at a more appropriate time. Kurt, shell-shocked, hadn't been able to choke out a response before Sebastian got defensive and blurted out something else about Kurt still being hung up over his last boyfriend. That hadn't been a good idea at all, and pretty soon they were shouting and being asked to leave. Kurt was thoroughly embarrassed by being a part of a scene that was going to be talked about _all over the place _at work the next day and hopped in a cab without another word to Sebastian.

It had been maybe a week, and the apologetic voicemails were plentiful.

"Kurt, I didn't mean what I said, could you please call me back?"

"I mean, I meant the first thing, just not that thing about Anderson. I just really need to talk to you, okay babe?"

"You're being really fucking childish, Hummel, you know that? Forget it, I'm tired of dealing with your little bitch fits."

"Fuck, I didn't mean that either, I'm such a fucking moron. You know I always say the wrong thing. Please call me back."

"If you don't call me back, I'm going to start pestering Rachel. I know she's hell to deal with when she's in a bad mood."

"I guess calling her that late wasn't the best idea to get her on my side. You were right about the screeching."

"Baby please call me back, now Rachel keeps calling me and I'm kind of terrified. She knows where I live now."

"You're the one who told her to keep calling me, aren't you? Fuck."

"Kurt, I miss you. Please talk to me?"

It was a Saturday night and Rachel was attempting to cook while Kurt arranged on layouts for work on the couch when he finally got the call that made him relent. He waited out the usual ringtone and Rachel popped in from the kitchen to listen. He put the voicemail on speaker phone and laid it on the coffee table.

"Hey Kurt, it's me again. Look, I'm really fucking sorry about what happened, okay? I just… this is the first time I've felt like this, and I knew it was too soon but it just slipped out, and then you didn't answer and I felt like such an idiot and… That's not an excuse, I know. I'm just really sorry, and I'm really bad at saying I'm sorry, and I just want to go back to how things were. Can we talk? Please?"

Kurt smiled a little at the phone on the table and looked up just in time to see Rachel roll her eyes and throw up her hands, the clearest "if you really _must _forgive him _already_" gesture he'd ever seen. He picked up the phone and hit redial.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Sebastian."

"_Kurt. _Listen, I am so sorry about the museum, it was stupid for me to get so upset –"

"I heard, I know, you've only left me dozens of messages."

"Kurt, I –"

"You're interrupting me again. This whole thing started because you jumped to conclusions and wouldn't let me speak." Kurt paused and there was silence on the other end of the line. "Much better. I was calling to let you know that your probation is being lifted on one condition."

"…and that is?" Sebastian sounded hesitant.

"Buy me lunch tomorrow and pay for admission for both of us for the museum, assuming they'll let us back in. I barely got to see anything last time, and this is the last weekend for the exhibit. You will not rush me."

The other boy chuckled. "Sure thing, babe. So, are we…?"

"We're fine, Bas." He grinned at the sigh of relief he heard, and Rachel rolled her eyes at him, retreating into the kitchen to avoid whatever sickening conversation was surely coming. "Oh, and Bas?"

"Yeah?"

"Before you interrupted me… I was going to say I love you, too."

* * *

A/N: If you're getting this on the re-upload and it has caused confusion, my apologies - forgot the author's note. I just wanted to welcome you to my first Kurtbastian story! I accept prompts for this story and my other drabble collection (which is Klaine), so if you have something you'd like me to write, let me know here or on tumblr (I have the same name there, but with dashes between the words). The drabbles are not necessarily going to be related, so don't let that confuse you. Any trigger warnings will be posted at the top of the chapter. ...I think that's about it.

ALSO I USED MORE CURSE WORDS IN THIS STORY THAN I THINK I HAVE IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. Okay, that is all. ^_^

Thanks for reading!

(Disclaimer: Glee belongs to Ryan Murphy and FOX. This story is purely for entertainment purposes and not profit.)


	2. Summer Sun

Summer Sun

Summary: Blaine had a moment, about Kurt. It's just too bad that it happened in the middle of the summer.

* * *

There was a moment, Blaine supposed, when a person realizes that the one they'd been looking for had been right in front of them all along. Blaine's moment about his best friend happened at his aunt's house a couple of states over in the middle of the summer. The house was filled with the smell of baking cookies one afternoon and it reminded him of the frantic baking that took place just before Kurt's first round of Dalton exams. He had his phone out and a joking message half typed-out before he remembered that they hadn't really talked much that summer, and that was when he kind of just knew. He missed Kurt, and he missed how easy things were between them. He really wanted this, and he almost called his friend, but it was the kind of revelation that should probably be revealed in person, he decided, and definitely within kissing distance, so he waited until his first day back at Dalton.

It was probably the best first day of school since kindergarten, he decided while walking down the hallways. He hadn't seen Kurt yet, but they would have to see each other in Warbler practice and then he could invite the other boy to coffee after school, as was their tradition. He'd spent most of the morning coming up with scenarios – what he would say and exactly how Kurt would respond. All of them ended with plans for a first official date, enormous smiles, and nervous giggles.

The only other tidbit of news that could penetrate Blaine's relative brick wall of daydreams was that there was a new transfer to the school who wanted to audition. There were plenty of rumors flying around, but Blaine relied on what Jeff and Nick were whispering about him over lunch - apparently he was from Paris and he'd moved to Ohio over the summer or something. It seemed like he was going to be a great addition to the glee club, but it had to be a huge change to attend such a prestigious school in a completely new country, and probably without friends. Blaine fondly remembered the day when Kurt transferred and thought that maybe he and Kurt could take the new kid under their wing. He was probably nervous - he would have to be invited to coffee with them. Tomorrow maybe; Blaine had plans for today.

He finally got his first glance at his best friend in English class, and almost ran into the door frame; Kurt had definitely filled out over the summer in the best ways – he was taller and leaner, and moved with an easy grace that came from an air of self-confidence that he hadn't always had. Blaine's suddenly-rapid heartbeat got caught in his throat and before he could sit in the empty seat next to Kurt, Jeff claimed it. Blaine ended up farther towards the back of the classroom and was distracted for the entire period by watching Kurt. The shorter boy sighed - why hadn't he seen this last year? They could have been dating all summer by now... And then Blaine was distracted by the thought of what kissing Kurt Hummel might be like, and all hope of productivity was lost.

Blaine hadn't seen Kurt again by the time Warbler practice began, but that was probably for the best. His nerves were starting to get to him, and if he'd been forced to hold a conversation his end would probably have come out as mindless chatter. As soon as he got to the commons that they used for practice, though, he was looking for the other boy, and he was gratified to hear a familiar, beautiful voice exclaim "Blaine!"

He was practically tackled from behind with a hug. When Kurt let go he was grinning hugely and dragging Blaine farther into the room. "I can't believe I haven't seen you all summer! Where were you hiding? I missed you!"

Blaine shrugged happily, sitting next to him on a couch. "We had some big family trip, and then I had work. It was nice, but it's nicer being back." Blaine took one of Kurt's hands into his own, smiling softly. Kurt smiled back, but when he glanced at the hand holding his, the smile faltered slightly. "Listen, Kurt, there's something I really need to talk to you about. Would you like to-"

Before Blaine could finish the thought, a smooth, unfamiliar voice interrupted. "Hey, Kurt."

The boy in front of them was tall and unfamiliar, brunette with brown eyes, and extremely nice to look at. He was all lean muscles and height, and though he didn't have a hint of a French accent, Blaine realized that he must be the new transfer student. He didn't seem nervous – in fact, he looked relatively serene, standing in front of them both like he belonged there. He glanced at Blaine but his eyes were mostly taken by Kurt, and Blaine felt a strange twisting in his gut. Kurt must have had a few classes with him, for them to be on such easy terms already.

The hand in his was gone in an instant as Kurt leapt to his feet again. "Well hello, stranger - I don't think I've seen you since last period." He turned back to face Blaine, and his face was breath-taking - it was like the sun was shining from where he stood, and Blaine thought Kurt's face might split in two from the way he was grinning. Blaine wouldn't have minded basking in it for a little while, but Kurt was speaking again. "I don't think the two of you have met. Sebastian, this is a good friend of mine, Blaine; I'm pretty sure I've mentioned him before." Sebastian held out a hand and Blaine stood and politely smiled at the boy who was unsettlingly calm. "Blaine, this is Sebastian, -" they clasped hands "-my boyfriend."

Blaine felt the smile drop from his face and his hand go limp. He looked between the two of them as Sebastian released his hand, trying to make sense of what was going on. Kurt... had a boyfriend? Who was very attractive and from Paris… he kind of felt like he was going to be sick.

"You... Ah, um, when exactly did this happen?" The question came out mangled and choked. Kurt just smiled and took the stranger's hand, seemingly unaware of Blaine's distress.

"We met over the summer – Sebastian's car was broken down on the side of the road and his phone was dead, and I just happened to be in the right place." Kurt grinned at what was obviously some kind of inside joke, and they _already had inside jokes, oh god_. "I guess you could say I was his knight in shining armor."

Sebastian sniggered, a wicked smile taking over his features. "Say what you want, babe, but you know you'll always be the princess in this relationship." Kurt smacked him in the shoulder but he didn't seem particularly upset.

The conversation continued to be awkward and one-sided; Blaine still hadn't wrapped his head around the idea by the time that Kurt wandered off to see a few of his other friends, and he fell back onto the couch with a huff. Sebastian sat gingerly beside him. After an awkward silence, the other boy spoke up. "I take it that wasn't the kind of news you wanted to hear?"

Blaine sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. Talking about his disappointment with Kurt's _boyfriend_ was probably not a good idea, but no one had ever accused him of making good decisions. "No offense or anything - I'm sure you're a great guy - but I've known Kurt for a while now and I'm a little surprised that he'd jump into something like this so quickly. I always thought he'd prefer to have a relationship with someone he knows well."

Sebastian leaned back into the seat, crossing his arms. He stared at Blaine for a while, and just as it was about to become uncomfortable, he spoke up. "You know, Kurt was right - you have come up in conversation before. And I'm not the kind of boyfriend who's going to tell Kurt who he can and can't be friends with, because he wouldn't listen to me anyway, but I feel like you and I should have an understanding." His face was a lot less friendly than it had been when Kurt was there. "You had your chance to win him over. You could not have possibly had an easier opportunity – he told me all about how he went to you when the bullying escalated, and how you helped him adjust to Dalton. He also told me about that little comment you made about him being just like someone who made his life hell." The green-eyed boy looked positively dangerous now, and Blaine found himself leaning away slightly from his place on the couch. Sebastian leaned closer, lowering his voice. "You fucked up, Blaine Anderson, and it's my turn now. _Kurt_ is mine now, and we know each other _very _well. And if you do anything to upset him…" The sentence went unfinished, but the intent was clear.

Sebastian leaned back and smiled pleasantly as though he _hadn't _just almost-threatened Blaine, waving and standing when he saw Kurt glance over to him. "Well, it was nice to meet you, Blaine Anderson. I'm glad we had a chance to talk. I guess I'll be seeing you around." He made as though to leave but hesitated, and when he turned back around to face Blaine again, a huge, knowing smirk covered his face. It didn't take the shorter boy very long to decide that he was really going to learn to hate that smirk in the coming months. "And the next time you decide to tell my boyfriend that he isn't sexy, you should probably have some proof. Because I do, and I can assure you that Kurt Hummel is _devastatingly _sexy. And very much taken." Sebastian chuckled at Blaine's wide-eyed expression and walked across the room where Kurt was waiting for him. Blaine groaned and slumped from his place on the couch.

He decided that _devastating_ was pretty much exactly what the situation was.

* * *

A/N: So this is my first prompt fill - I'm a little nervous and I hope it came out okay. Also I really like this idea - don't be surprised if there's a one-shot or something at some point about that summer. ^_^ NOW TO FILL ALL OF THE PROMPTS. Thanks for sending them, and thanks for reading!

(Disclaimer: Glee belongs to Ryan Murphy and FOX. This story is purely for entertainment purposes and not profit.)


	3. Smooth Criminal

Smooth Criminal

Summary: After suffering a crushing blow to his confidence, Kurt decides that he needs to prove, onstage, that he's perfectly okay. Things do not go according to plan.

(Note: Begins with Klaine, no slushy incident)

Kurt never expected to end up on the auditorium stage with Sebastian standing across from him and the beginning of smooth criminal playing in the background, but then, he also never expected to hear the words "_Kurt, we need to talk._"

They'd been followed up by things like "_I really do care about you, but I think I might have something with him_" and "_It wouldn't be fair of me to have these thoughts and stay with you._" There were probably more, but all Kurt could remember about the rest of the conversation was a stinging in his hand as he'd opened the door to the Navigator and how hard it was to see the road around silent tears.

The rumors spread like they always did and Kurt tried to ignore them; they weren't the worst things that had ever been said about him, he reminded himself. Sitting in the choir room was tortuous, though; he was so close, but Kurt couldn't touch anymore, couldn't run to him with his problems or his small victories, all because a stranger with a tendency for one-night stands had taken an interest. It _ached_. Kurt felt used. He did his best not to make it obvious. He answered all of expected questions about how he was coping with stoic, monosyllable answers.

Rachel noticed. Well, everyone noticed, but Rachel didn't let it go. "Is there anything I can do?" She'd been trying to ask the question for a while, and Kurt was about to say no when a sudden idea occurred to him.

"I want to have a sing-off." There was a high potential for disaster – it was inevitable, actually – but Kurt didn't really care.

"With Blaine?"

"No, with Sebastian Smythe. So we can decide who gets Michael."

Rachel was hard to convince; it took her several long moments to grasp that Kurt wasn't being sarcastic. He managed to appeal to her sense of what was ultimately best for their glee club, though he had a feeling that, in the end, Rachel would have gone along with pretty much any plan that would potentially make him feel better. It was a benefit of being friends with Rachel Berry - no plan was too crazy as long as it contributed to the current goal. To himself, Kurt had to admit that the singing didn't matter; he just wanted to see the other boy's face, to know if he and Blaine were already together.

More than that, though, he needed to put this behind him – he needed to get angry, to yell and scream his frustrations, because right at that moment he just felt numb. He wanted to prove to someone that he was not broken, even though he felt that way. If he could prove to Sebastian that even now, on the losing side, he was still strong, he might actually believe it.

Rachel was the one to propose the idea to the rest of the club before Mr. Shuester showed up for class. The announcement was met with mixed reactions - a few people protested that they should be the ones singing for the chance to use Michael, and some questioned the wisdom of letting Kurt and Sebastian onstage together, but Rachel Berry and Kurt Hummel combined were not a force that could be easily stopped. Blaine gave his ex a pained look that Kurt absolutely ignored.

Never one for catching subtle hints, he tried to corner Kurt after class, clearly not getting the message that Kurt wanted to be left alone. "I'm sorry about all of this. I know it's not fair to you."

It _wasn't_ fair, but eventually Kurt was going to have to forgive him for a feeling that Blaine probably couldn't help. It was too soon, though, and Kurt was still too bitter over the entire thing. He really wasn't ready to talk about this yet.

"I'm… We've been talking. Just so you know."

Kurt sighed. He stopped what he was doing but stared at his bag as he spoke. "You're telling me this like it's any of my business, which begs the question of why the hell you would think that's appropriate."

"I just think that this competition isn't the best way to deal with... this. If you want to talk…"

"Then I sure as hell wouldn't go to you."

Blaine had the audacity to look hurt at the comment. "I still want to be your friend, Kurt."

The other boy let out a bitter laugh, swinging his messenger bag over his shoulder. He wouldn't be able to handle being Blaine's friend for a long time. "Maybe you shouldn't have asked me to be your boyfriend in the first place, then."

Blaine sighed. "You're right – that part was probably a mistake." Kurt froze and Blaine's eyes widened as he realized what he'd said. "Kurt, no, that's not what I meant –" But Kurt had already left, almost running out of the choir room.

The incoherent phone call he made to Rachel that afternoon only made her more determined to do whatever her friend thought would make him feel better. She'd arranged a meeting with the Warblers in the McKinley auditorium before the week was out, and Blaine didn't get to talk to Kurt again, as she somehow popped up whenever the two were in the vicinity of each other. That didn't stop him from trying, though, as evidenced by the phone calls and text messages, all promptly deleted.

The competition took place after school – Rachel convinced Mr. Schue that the glee club needed a closed rehearsal, and it said something about how closely he was paying attention that he never questioned why he wasn't allowed at his own club's practice. Puck was really excited about a video of a couple of cellists dueling over a cover of a Michael song online and bought it for the duet before anyone could stop him, effectively deciding the song before it could be discussed. Everyone was there to see what would happen, the New Directions on one side of the front-most seats, and the Warblers on another. Santana had a pool going over which boy would manage to draw blood first when the duet inevitably ended in a catfight.

Kurt stood on his side offstage. Sebastian was across from him. He'd only seen the taller boy for a few seconds before they found their places, but it was enough to make Kurt want to tear the smirk off of his face and wipe the floor with it. He was not going to lose, not this time.

The rumble of the cellos started low and deep over the sound system as the lights came on – it was almost as though the cellists were there, sitting in the middle of the stage, staring down at their instruments intently as their bows flit over the strings. The music rose higher and faster, and Sebastian stepped out onto the stage, as arrogant and self-assured as always. "_As he came out into the window, it was the sound of a crescendo…_"

Kurt felt the moment take over. Expressing himself onstage was what he was comfortable with; this was familiar to him. Leaving all of his doubts and pain at the edge of the curtain, he sauntered out with every bit of the confidence Sebastian had displayed. They began circling each other, throwing lines of song at one another like pointed barbs even though the lyrics weren't meant to insult, keeping up with each other's steps and harmony as if they'd rehearsed it.

"_Annie, are you okay?_"

"_So, Annie, are you okay?_"

"_Are you okay, Annie?_"

It was a mocking dance, the question so completely insincere that it was laughable. Kurt didn't linger on too much on the lyrics – he'd been hearing different versions of that question all week. It was a taunt now, thrown at him repeatedly, and it just made Kurt work harder to keep up and gain the upper hand. They kept going faster, Kurt lingering closer in the chase in his determination until Sebastian made a sudden move closer when he was supposed to back away and Kurt stumbled, barely keeping himself from falling.

Kurt regained his footing quickly, but the slip threw him off - he could feel himself starting to lose the stoic control he'd managed to maintain so far, and as much as he didn't want to show weakness in front of Sebastian he couldn't quite find that confidence that he'd initially had. The taller boy's vicious, victorious grin slowly transformed into something more contemplative as the song went on.

Then there was an instrumental break, and the two were left staring at each other, unsure of how to proceed. The doubts crept back over Kurt from where he'd left them, now that the music was no longer a distraction. It was more than just the break-up that was making him numb, Kurt realized in the relative silence - it was the worthlessness that defined the better part of his junior year, back again and just as huge and looming. It was every moment of insecurity he'd ever had in himself and his future, personified in a situation that might keep happening. Next time it might be his dreams for New York, snatched away at the last second, and how was he supposed to keep surviving through that? Or what if it was his dad, there one day and gone the next – it didn't take much to lose people, he knew that. Anything could go wrong; a sweet, selfless person like Blaine Anderson could decide one afternoon in a coffee shop that he just doesn't love you anymore. Kurt felt like he needed to get off of the stage, before he did something humiliating like crying in front of Sebastian Smythe.

The other boy clearly hadn't missed Kurt's changing expressions. He was watching closely, and Kurt was sure that he was looking for signs of weakness that he could take advantage of when the other boy mouthed a question from across the stage.

_Are you okay?_

And Kurt was sick of that question and the platitude that always followed. Yeah, sure, I'm fine. No really, it's just been a long day. I'm just tired. I don't need to talk, I'm fine. I'm fine.

"_I don't know!_"

Kurt didn't hold back, but the confidence he was hoping to regain eluded him. The line was loud, but desperate and frustrated and much more honest than he'd wanted to be. Sebastian didn't waste any time coming closer; seeing his approach, Kurt decided that he'd had enough and made a break for the side of the stage. The other boy's long legs meant that he got there first, though – and he must have been practically running – but he cut Kurt off and forced him back into center stage.

The circling transformed into a chase; no matter where Kurt tried to go, Sebastian was always there to head him off. Kurt felt like someone's prey, suddenly sympathetic to Annie. He avoided looking at the other boy, shouting music back at him in clear evasion as he searched for another escape route. Nothing worked. Sebastian was always a step behind him.

"_You've been hit by..._"

Sebastian reached out and caught Kurt's wrist.

"_You've been struck by..._"

He spun him around quickly and pulled him in.

"_A smooth criminal._"

Sebastian kissed him, and it was like an electric shock to his system - an emotional defibrillator. Kurt felt his heart beat for the first time in days. Everything was the smell of Sebastian's cologne and the feeling of Sebastian's hand holding him in place by the back of his neck and the slip-and-stick of Sebastian's lips against his own.

…but Kurt had never done well with being kissed by people he didn't particularly like, so Sebastian soon found himself shoved away by a shocked Kurt. "The fuck was that?" The question, meant to be harsh and demanding, came out as more of a squeak.

"You just looked like you needed kissing." Sebastian shrugged, his hand reaching up to brush his lips and just a bit of a smirk starting to play at the side of his mouth. "And maybe some therapy for whatever issues you obviously have."

He needed kissing. Okay, great. So what, Sebastian had just completely changed his mind about every interaction they'd had thus far? Kurt wondered if the other boy was high or something. "But… Blaine?"

"Fun until he gets drunk off of his ass," Sebastian said easily. "We're not exclusive, if that's what you were thinking." Under his breath, Kurt thought he heard the other boy mutter. "…no matter what _he _seems to think…"

Kurt just shook his head because none of this made sense, and Sebastian wasn't making anything clearer.

"After you've found someone to listen to all of your inane problems, you should call me. I know a few places you'd like a lot more than Scandals."

Kurt narrowed his eyes, suspicious of everything coming out of the taller boy's mouth. "I know what you mean by that, sex addict." At least that much was still clear. Unless he was planning to drug Kurt and leave him out in an alley somewhere, which Kurt really couldn't rule out. Sebastian was acting all kinds of shady.

Sebastian's smirk raised a couple of notches. "I don't know what you're trying to say – I'm a perfect Dalton gentleman." He straightened the lapels of his blazer. "If you're _that _eager to slip right into the physical, though, I won't object."

Kurt was _this close _to throwing something at him (and it would have to have been that chair at stage right since it was the closest) when Sebastian whipped out his phone and typed something quickly. "My number," he explained, "in case you need more kissing." Kurt felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and almost asked how the other boy had gotten _his _number, but decided he didn't really want to know. With one more smirk and a fake salute, Sebastian sauntered offstage. "See you at Regionals. I'll be the one with the huge-ass trophy." Kurt just stared after him, unable to come up with a sufficient response after the shocking – and admittedly fantastic – kiss.

Kurt hadn't seen the break-up coming. He would have taken up any bets on forever for Blaine and him, and it hurt to know that he'd been wrong, but then he hadn't expected Sebastian Smythe to kiss him, either. He wasn't okay yet, but he thought maybe he could be. …after a few more kisses, because kisses always help, and Sebastian _probably _wasn't trying to kill him. Right?

From the forgotten audience, Puck let out a low whistle and Kurt blushed bright red, realizing for the first time since the music started that his friends had witnessed everything.

* * *

A/N: I wish I had this duet on my ipod. I really do. Can I ask for that for Christmas?

So anyway, this is my second prompt fill and it was a lot of fun to write, so many thanks to the prompter! (Also, I feel like I should mention that I don't actually hate Blaine. Because I really don't... even though it must really seem like it right now. O_O) WELL I THINK I'M GONNA SLEEP NOW SO THAT I CAN FUNCTION AT WORK TOMORROW. Hope the story was coherent and stuff. Thanks for reading!

(Disclaimer: Glee belongs to Ryan Murphy and FOX. This story is purely for entertainment purposes and not profit.)


	4. Easy as 1-2-3

Easy as 1-2-3

Summary: Sebastian watches a performance and realizes he may have picked the wrong boyfriend to pursue.

* * *

"What do you know about Kurt Hummel?"

Jeff looked over at Sebastian Smythe, who was leaning forwards slightly in his chair. The New Directions were in the middle of _ABC_ onstage for Regional's and Sebastian seemed especially interested in the performance for someone who'd tried his best to make sure it never happened. "Is this your subtle way of asking me what his weaknesses are?"

"Do you know if he likes pasta?" Jeff just stared until Sebastian finally looked up. "What?"

"Tell me honestly before I answer: are you going to poison it?"

"What? Why would I do that?" He was giving Jeff a look that implied unflattering things about Jeff's intelligence.

"Because you hate him? You've said so. Often."

Sebastian shifted uncomfortably. "Yeah, well, that was before."

Jeff glanced back at the stage, smirking as he caught on. "Before the hip-swivel?"

Sebastian groaned and sank in his seat, attracting the attention of a few of their classmates. "How did he hide that?"

"How did you not notice?" Jeff remembered Kurt's brief attendance at Dalton, and the boy had never been subtle, especially not at first. He couldn't imagine that Kurt had changed that much since his transfer back to McKinley.

"All anyone could talk about was Blaine Anderson. No one ever said that Kurt could do that. No one even mentioned him."

Jeff shrugged. "He was only at Dalton for a few months and Blaine was our lead singer. Most of the Warblers idolized him."

Sebastian leaned back, obviously frustrated. "Well shit. What do I do now?"

"You accept the fact that you will never need to know if Kurt eats pasta."

Sebastian scowled and went back to watching the stage closely. His expression morphed into one eerily reminiscent of the one he'd had when he came up with the slushy idea and Jeff just shook his head, hoping that this wasn't the start of more potential lawsuits. He could only imagine how badly Kurt would bite Sebastian's head off if he actually tried anything. After the cocky habit his classmate had of strutting around school, Jeff kind of wished he could see that.

He got to see a bit of it from a distance after the competition. The Warblers were morose, filing quietly back in the direction of their bus outside, when Jeff spotted Sebastian, Kurt, and Blaine a distance away. The situation was clearly tense, with Sebastian and Kurt apparently going back and forth at a rapid pace, Blaine's head bobbing between them like he was watching a tennis match. Kurt finally stalked off, hands in the air in an "I am finished with your shit" gesture.

Jeff didn't see Sebastian again until he stalked on the bus. "How did the wooing go?" He wasn't usually one to taunt, but he couldn't help taking advantage of the clearly-addled Sebastian.

"Shut up, Sterling."

To Jeff's surprise, Sebastian did not give up after his resounding failure. It seemed like whenever Jeff saw Kurt, there was Sebastian, flirting so obviously that it was painful. It always ended in an argument; in fact, it got to the point where regulars at the Lima Bean anticipated the blowouts. Blaine always seemed terrified when things got heated, often just clutching his coffee cup and staring at it as though the arguing would stop if he just ignored it.

Sebastian spent more time with Jeff (and, by default, Nick) than either Nick or Jeff were sure they wanted to spend with him. It seemed that the longer Kurt put off Sebastian's advances and the more deeply he insulted their classmate, the more determined Sebastian was to win him over. It was always "what does Kurt like in his coffee" and "what does he even see in Blaine, anyway." The strut he was known for all but disappeared. People were starting to stare.

"He's like a kid who isn't getting what he wants for Christmas," Jeff commented to Nick one night after Sebastian left, asking more personal questions about Kurt's preferences. "Even if Kurt wasn't happily with Blaine, they don't want the same things. What would Sebastian even do if he got to Kurt besides break his heart?"

Nick couldn't say and Jeff never got around to asking Sebastian those questions, but he had an entirely new set when the tall boy showed up at Jeff's room one afternoon sporting a black eye.

Sebastian answered all of them with a simple and immediately worrying explanation. "I kissed him."

Jeff groaned. "God, Sebastian. You really have no sense of restraint, do you? You just do whatever you feel like because you can."

Sebastian didn't protest the accusation. "I wanted to know what it was like, so I went for it. Kurt Hummel can kiss, Jeff." The other boy was staring at the wall with a dazed expression. Jeff worried about how hard he'd been hit and whether it was possible that he had a concussion.

"Let me guess - he repaid you with a punch?"

"No, that was Blaine. I didn't realize he was there but he caught me in the act and got a lucky shot in before I could defend myself. Did you know that he boxes?"

"Yes, and I'm pretty sure someone mentioned it to you when you were pursuing him instead of his boyfriend."

Sebastian wasn't paying attention. "Kurt was blushing. He kissed me back. I think I finally got through to him." Jeff started to remind him of a few select facts like he usually did - he's got a boyfriend, he doesn't appreciate being stalked, he hates you - but then he caught site of his classmate's face. He'd never seen Sebastian smile like that, and the way he'd said Kurt's name was... different. Softer. It made Jeff hesitate and wonder about Sebastian's intentions.

"And then his boyfriend punched you," Jeff reminded him, snapping him back to the present. "So now what?"

"Now I step up my game. I have my foot in the door, Jeff, I can't give up now." Grinning, he was out of the room before Jeff could even offer to look for some ice. A second later, Sebastian's face poked back inside the door. "So... he likes pasta, right?"

"Yes, he likes pasta." Jeff wasn't going to be able to talk the other boy out of it now. If Sebastian hadn't had enough of being yelled at and punched yet, Jeff wasn't going to stand in his way.

"Thanks!" Sebastian's smile, black eye and all, made him seem suddenly much younger, and Jeff wondered if maybe this would turn out to be a good thing. ...eventually.

* * *

A/N: Thank goodness this site is being cooperative - I'm stuck on my phone for the foreseeable future and tumblr apparently doesn't like that. Also, I apologize if you got any unnecessary notifications - I was doing some site maintenance as per a request, so the summaries should appear up top to avoid any confusion. Let me know if there's something about a chapter you don't understand and I'll make a note of it at the beginning!

This one gave me a bit of trouble, so thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed!

(Disclaimer: Glee is owned by Ryan Murphy and FOX. This is meant for entertainment purposes only and not for profit.)


	5. Talk to Me

Talk to Me

Summary: Kurt's lost plenty, but somehow Sebastian is still there.

* * *

"You're going to talk to me today."

Kurt glared at the taller boy sitting across from him. "Bas," he hissed finally.

Sebastian grinned, but didn't relent. "I love that you remember my name, babe - it's really an honor - but I want a sentence today. And I'm willing to sit right here and wait for it." He sat, serene and infuriating. Kurt continued to glare, his mouth shut insistently.

They had a small standoff that Kurt knew his friend would win. Back when the arrangement grudgingly started, Sebastian spent hours waiting for him to start the conversation just to be mean. Now it was Sebastian's most effective method of getting Kurt to do what he wanted; if there was anyone who was as stubborn as Kurt was, it was Sebastian.

Kurt took a deep breath. "I-I... Mm... ahm, ahmkur." As usual, Kurt's words got lost somewhere between his head and his mouth, coming out as jumbled syllables. Kurt groaned in frustration - Sebastian didn't relent.

"Come on, I know I heard some actual communication when you were ranting at that lady at the mall last week along with some very colorful language."

"A-ac... acci... accident."

"Three syllables, that's impressive. And it wasn't an accident; you just weren't holding yourself back." Noting Kurt's change of expression, he laughed. "Nice try, but batting those baby blues at me is not going to work." Kurt scowled at him.

"Ha.. ha-ate you."

"Love you too, babe. Luckily for you, because nobody else would put up with you for this long." Sebastian didn't mean it – he never did. That was the funny thing about brain damage, though – people really didn't stick around. It was uncomfortable and hard for them. It was so much easier to sit and wait by someone's bedside when a drunk driver put them into a coma than it was to deal with the aftermath. Kurt tried not to be bitter, but that was hard, too. He was the same person below the surface, but they didn't see him anymore; they saw his struggle to form words, his difficulty moving properly. He'd become his disability to many of the people who he'd once considered friends, and they didn't know how to be around him so they just weren't.

Sebastian was still there, though. At first it was just to make Kurt's life difficult after running into him at the Recovery Center, but somewhere between their frequent, lopsided, and violent fighting they'd bonded. No matter what Kurt said or did, Sebastian stayed; somehow, they'd become friends. Sebastian never forgot that Kurt was there. Now Sebastian seemed to be the one most convinced that Kurt would recover someday.

He must have seen some change in Kurt's expression after his extended silence, because his smile slowly faded. "You can do this, Kurt. Not because some doctor says so or because I say so, but because nobody tells Kurt Hummel that he'll never do something again. Don't rush yourself; I don't mind spending time with you." Sebastian smiled and Kurt pulled himself back into the present. The moping wouldn't get him anywhere; he could think about what he'd lost later. Sebastian's smile turned into a smirk, as it always seemed to do. "Even if you are the absolute worst person at keeping a conversation going."

Kurt rolled his eyes, took a deep breath, and tried again.

* * *

A/N: I think this is probably the shortest fanfiction thing I've ever written. It's really more of a sample than an individual story; I'm thinking about writing a longer story around this idea, and I'm kinda testing the waters here and on tumblr to see if anyone would be interested in reading it (or beta reading for it, because this is gonna require lots of medical knowledge and I have none). So um... let me know if you like it, I guess? ^_^

I've also gotten a lot of requests for a sequel to the last drabble, so that should be the next thing I write/post. YOUR PATIENCE IS APPRECIATED AND WILL BE REWARDED. Thanks for reading!

(Disclaimer: Glee belongs to Ryan Murphy and FOX. This story is purely for entertainment purposes and not for profit.)


	6. Simple as Do-Re-Mi

Simple as Do-Re-Mi

Summary: Sebastian was certain that taking Kurt out to a nice restaurant for their first date would be easy. He was wrong. (Sequel to Easy as 1-2-3)

* * *

"I'm really sorry about that." It was dark outside and Sebastian and Kurt were sitting in Sebastian's car outside of the restaurant. "I just… I'm not even really sure what happened."

"Well, I know you cursed out the waiter loud enough for half of the restaurant to hear," Kurt mused. "I can't remember if that older couple started calling for a manager before or after that. And either you or that woman with the hair ended up punching the waiter, I didn't actually see which."

"I'm pretty sure it was her." Sebastian massaged his bruised knuckles under the steering wheel.

"Either way, I can see why you might want to black it out."

Sebastian threw his head back against the seat and groaned. "I am so fucking sorry about that, Kurt. I've never done the whole dating thing but I thought I could handle one dinner… _Shit_, that was the worst fucking excuse for a first date." The entire evening had been an unmitigated disaster. He'd been late to pick Kurt up, said all of the wrong things, almost convinced Kurt to order something the other boy was allergic to, and as if that wasn't enough to ensure that he would never get a second chance…

"It's true that most first dates don't end with getting kicked out of the restaurant…"

…there was always that. He'd worked so hard for this chance and in a span of less than an hour he'd managed to destroy the entire evening. Sebastian felt about two feet tall in his seat, staring out of the front windshield to avoid looking at Kurt. "I bet you wish you were anywhere else right now, don't you?"

Kurt huffed softly and Sebastian glanced over to him, surprised to see that his date didn't look particularly distressed by the way the evening was going. "I wouldn't say that. We didn't get to eat much of the food, but the company was mostly bearable."

A hint of Sebastian's usual smirk returned. "I've got to at least rate better than that Berry girl who's always hanging around."

Kurt just rolled his eyes. Earlier, he'd sardonically informed Sebastian that Rachel had been on the phone with him before the other boy finally drove up and had threatened to ruin his good name if he didn't show. He didn't know what Kurt saw in that girl that made them so close - she was really fucking crazy. He'd already been personally threatened against breaking her friend's heart, which he guessed was understandable given the Chandler debacle and everything that followed… namely, his opportunity to finally ask Kurt on a date.

After a moment of silence, Kurt's shoulders hunched up and he stared out of his own window. "And… thank you. For before."

Sebastian glanced over; now it was Kurt that looked two feet tall. He really wished that this wasn't their first date so he could at least give Kurt a hug or something without feeling like he was overstepping his boundaries.

By far the worst part of the evening was their waiter, who never missed an opportunity to take jabs at them. It was obvious that Kurt and Sebastian were on a date; everyone else in the nice Italian restaurant were either there as a couple or with family, and Sebastian wasn't subtle about flirting and trying to work up the nerve to hold Kurt's hand across the table. It was Kurt that the waiter targeted most, frequently calling him "ma'am" and making unpleasant insinuations that had Kurt growing more quiet and Sebastian growing more on-edge as the date progressed. When Kurt finally made an escape to the restroom shortly after the entrees were served, Sebastian pulled the waiter to the side and angrily demanded to know what the guy's problem was, only to be informed that the restaurant was "family-oriented" and that management would back up his behavior. Sebastian was told that if he made much more of a fuss, the manager would be well within his rights to remove them both from the premises.

Sebastian Smythe had never been all that good at taking orders, and by the time Kurt got back to their table the taller boy was cursing the waiter out at a volume that ensured every "family" being served could hear. A lady with hair piled haphazardly on top of her head started wailing about her children and an older couple in the corner complained - though they'd been giving the table dirty looks all night, so it might not have been motivated by the noise - and Kurt and Sebastian were asked to leave. Kurt dragged him out before they could get into any more trouble but not before Sebastian could punch that bastard in the jaw, which he was _damn fucking proud of_ because no one was going to talk to Kurt like that in front of him.

"Stupid fucking homophobic assholes…"

"Sebastian."

"I'm going to sue all of them and their entire fucking restaurant chain…"

"_Sebastian._"

Sebastian looked back over at Kurt. He was smiling again, a genuine smile, and it was the best thing Sebastian had seen all night. Kurt leaned over slowly and hesitated, looking up at his date, and even in the dim light from the parking lot Sebastian could see how blue and clear his eyes looked. Sebastian's breath caught in his throat and he froze, waiting to see what Kurt would do. It was stunning, and terrifying, the way this one boy could make him more nervous and more excited than anyone else he'd ever encountered. Kurt's eyes flickered to Sebastian's mouth; he took a quick breath and darted forward to kiss the other boy on the cheek, and the small, momentary touch was like a shock, making Sebastian's heart beat double-time. "Thank you. Not just anyone would get kicked out of a restaurant to defend my honor."

Sebastian gave his best show of not being flustered, but it was his first date and he stuttered a little before he managed to get back his usual air of confidence. "I, ah… Anytime. If you don't mind your name being dragged through the mud amid the Ohio upper class. There will be plenty of phone calls to my dad by morning, I'm sure; wouldn't want you to sully your reputation by being seen with me."

"It's a bit late for that, isn't it? We've been friends for a while, I'm sure my reputation is ruined already…" Kurt glanced at the lit numbers on the console. "You know, it's still pretty early. We could catch a movie or something. …I'll share a bag of popcorn with you?"

Sebastian shook his head in mock dismay, but started the car again anyway. "Well, it isn't pasta…"

Kurt shrugged, suddenly looking a little coy and shy all at once, leaning back into his seat and putting more of that maddening space between them. "I was really looking forward to tonight. …I guess I'm just not ready for it to be over yet." There was that smile again, those big, blue eyes, and Sebastian could already tell that he was done for. He hoped the rest of the night was better than the beginning, because he was pretty sure needed more of those eyes.

He put the car in drive. "Then let's make more people stare." Kurt laughed.

When Sebastian got back to back to Dalton later that night, Jeff was waiting up for him. They got as far as Sebastian's room before Jeff couldn't hold back his curiosity any longer. "Well? How did it go?"

"He kissed me. When I brought him home after the movie." Sebastian closed the door behind them and fell backwards onto his bed. "Fuck. I've got it bad, don't I?"

Jeff didn't disagree, sitting next to the other boy on the bed. After having his own personal space reduced to shreds by Sebastian's constant need for courting advice, he had no qualms about walking into Sebastian's room technically uninvited. "You guys went to a movie? I thought you were taking him to that fancy Italian place…"

Sebastian just shrugged at him. "Forget the fucking Italian food, Jeff; he kissed me. As in, he initiated it. _Fuck_," he breathed, eyes a little wide, "I really want to do that again. How do people not just spend all of their time attached at the mouth?"

"I'm pretty sure the Sebastian of a previous life would cringe at your new romantic streak. He would say there were things much more enjoyable than kissing."

"He never kissed Kurt Hummel."

Jeff waited for more details, but Sebastian didn't seem like he was going to continue, opting instead to just stare at his ceiling. "So," Jeff prompted, unwilling to just leave it there after all of the personal effort he'd gone through to give Sebastian and Kurt a fighting chance with each other, seeing as how fighting had once been the only thing they were willing to do together. "Was that all you did all night? A movie and kissing? Did you manage to squeeze any actual conversation into that hectic schedule?"

"A little bit." Sebastian's voice sounded strange, and Jeff glanced back at him. He was smiling again, and this time it was hopeful, not even a hint of a smirk anywhere on his face. "I think he likes me. There's not much to like, but… I think he does."

Jeff lay back and stared at the ceiling, too. "If he's put up with you this long, I'm sure he does."

"He'd be the first."

Sebastian never said much about his own life, but it didn't take a very large stretch of the imagination to know that he hadn't had an ideal upbringing. Jeff knew he could offer platitudes and reassurances, but what Sebastian needed was more than friendship. "Sounds like someone to hang onto, then."

"I'd like to."

* * *

A/N: So I now call this the pasta!verse even though this will probably be the last thing I write for it. ^_^ I hope everyone who liked the last one enjoyed this one as well! OH YEAH - the lovely Bablefisk is currently working on a full-length fic version thing of Easy as 1-2-3, so if you liked that drabble you should go and check it out cuz I know I will! :D (I don't know what it will be called yet, but I'll let you guys know as I know more.)

Another brief thing: I will definitely be writing a (much) longer thing on Talk to Me (I made a playlist, so it's pretty much mandatory now). If anyone would be willing to beta, I would be extremely grateful! Anyway, thanks for reading!

(Disclaimer: Glee belongs to Ryan Murphy and FOX. This story is purely for entertainment purposes and not for profit.)


	7. Unbearable Living Conditions

Unbearable Living Conditions

Summary: Kurt and Sebastian fight all the time until Blaine, their roommate, decides that he's had enough of letting them get away with not talking about their feelings; if they won't talk to each other, he'll just have to do the talking instead.

* * *

In hindsight, Blaine really couldn't remember why he'd thought it would be a good idea to split an apartment with two of his friends.

"Sebastian Smythe, if you do not stop _leaving your dirty clothes all over my bed…_"

Maybe he'd just been optimistic. Maybe he'd been horribly naive.

"You're the woman of the house, you're supposed to take care of the clothes and food and shit! I'm just trying to help you out, Hummel!"

Whatever the case may be, splitting an apartment with Kurt Hummel and Sebastian Smythe had been the worst decision Blaine had ever made. It was an unending horror in all kinds of unforeseen ways.

"Well, I hope you weren't fond of anything you left in here because I'm not going down to get it!"

Blaine flinched at the sound of the window being slammed open, a sentiment that was shared by Sebastian's gasp from his room on the other side of the apartment. "You wouldn't fucking _dare_, Hummel!" Evidently he didn't believe his own assertion, because Blaine could hear him running across the apartment. The shouting continued, concentrated on one side of the limited living space.

He'd been so hopeful, too. He'd really believed that Sebastian and Kurt would make amazing friends. They were both so smart and quick-witted, and they were both so passionate about the things they loved – he'd been so excited to introduce them. He'd had a very clear mental picture of how great it would be for the three of them to be friends, living together in New York.

Those dreams had been premature, as it turned out, because the first quip out of Sebastian's mouth had been to insult Kurt's clothes, and ever since then the two had been at each others' throats over everything.

Not every fight was vicious - most days it was just a steady stream of jabs at each other, little things like how, as health-conscious as he was, Kurt just had to have butter all over his biscuits when they actually had biscuits, and how Sebastian's old Tom's weren't fit for chew-toys. Every so often, when tension was high or when one or both was tired, it would come to shouting. And maybe once or twice, their fights would be really cruel.

Blaine remembered getting home once when both of them had forgotten their keys and the landlady wouldn't let them use her copy. Blaine had found them sitting out in the hallway, closer together than he had maybe ever seen them before. Kurt had just lifted his head from Sebastian's shoulders and was looking up at him and Sebastian was looking back down at Kurt; they were no more than an inch apart, and there was an apprehensive feeling of something about to _happen_ that filled the entire hallway. Blaine froze; the tension around the two demanded it.

It was too late for Blaine to keep his presence unnoticed, though, and the moment was broken as Sebastian jumped to his feet, leaving Kurt to narrowly avoid face-planting on the floor. "Fucking _finally_, I thought I would be stuck out here with that revolting face all night." He snatched the key from Blaine and slipped inside the apartment.

Blaine had turned to talk to Kurt – he didn't even remember what inane comment he'd come up with – to see Kurt giving the half-open door a startled, betrayed look that was quickly sinking into outright hurt. Blaine decided it would be best not to say anything.

The second fight of its kind – if you could even really call it a fight – had happened maybe a week later. Sebastian suggested to the room at large that maybe they could all go out for drinks on Saturday and get their bonding time on. Blaine didn't miss the way the other boy looked at Kurt after asking the question, as if Kurt's answer actually mattered. That had been a first, and Blaine wasn't an idiot, so he decided to test a theory and said no, thank you, he had a big project he needed to work on, but they shouldn't let that keep them from going out and enjoying themselves.

Not even looking up from his work on the couch, Kurt told them he had a date with Adam Crawford on Saturday night. "Don't let that ruin your night, though, Sebastian. I'm sure there are plenty of horny strangers you'd rather spend your time with."

Sebastian didn't go out that Saturday. He drifted aimlessly through the apartment, and Blaine harbored the secret idea that his roommate was waiting for Kurt to get home before Sebastian finally gave up and went to bed.

After one of _those_ fights, the bickering and gentle jabs would disappear for days and in their place would be cold silence. It would take a while, and no one would actually apologize, but eventually one would break the ice - Sebastian would crack a joke or Kurt would throw a wet dishtowel at Sebastian as he passed through the kitchen, and for just an instant Blaine could see what life might be like for them if they stopped being so stubborn and actually talked to each other. There were tiny moments of clarity but then something else would set them off and they would start shouting again, and Blaine would be stuck in his room, trying to study as his roommates tried to belittle each other because being honest about how they felt seemed beyond them when it wasn't some expression of annoyance. It was a vicious cycle.

The volume of the shouting coming from Kurt's room swelled and after weeks of dealing with fluctuating levels of drama, Blaine reached his breaking point. He tried to tell himself that it was up to Kurt and Sebastian to figure things out, but the argument was edging towards cruel and he knew that he couldn't take another week of tense silence. He was not going to live like this any longer.

"_Kurt never actually went on a date with Adam Crawford!_"

There was instant silence in Kurt's room as Blaine tried to determine if he'd actually just screamed at the top of his lungs and as his roommates processed the information. He didn't give them any time to react before continuing; it was therapeutic, and they were finally listening. "He sat at Callbacks for five hours and got himself drunk, and when he got home later that night he cried into my shoulder about how he just wanted to not care so much when Sebastian told him things or looked at him in a certain way but didn't actually mean any of it."

Now that he'd started, Blaine found it difficult to stop. "Sebastian's the one who gets the biscuits from the bakery down the street. He gets up at five in the morning to buy them before they sell out, but he's never actually eaten any. I think he does it to watch Kurt take that first bite, because he's always smiling right when that happens. He also followed Kurt all night when Rachel decided it was a good idea to go bar-hopping in a really questionable part of town. It was Kurt that managed to get rid of that creep that Sebastian brought home once. The guy wouldn't leave the apartment until Kurt started twirling a kitchen knife around. But both of you, for whatever idiotic reason you've come up with, have decided that you hate each other and that's the end of it."

Blaine stood up and started packing up a few of his books; he really needed to get some air before the word vomit got any worse and he said something he couldn't take back. "Now, because studying in my own apartment is obviously impossible, I'm going to be at the library for the next three hours. You two are going to stay here and talk about all of the things I just said and what they could possibly mean. You're both intelligent people; I'm sure it won't be that difficult." He couldn't resist a dramatic slam of the front door as he left.

When Blaine got back to the apartment that evening it was still quiet, and for a brief instant he worried that his roommates hadn't talked at all, opting instead to stand awkwardly in Kurt's room the whole time. The room was empty when he peeked inside, though.

They must have come to some kind of agreement, because when Blaine found them they were sprawled out on the couch together. Kurt had his head leaning on Sebastian's chest, fast asleep, and Sebastian was playing with Kurt's hair gently. When Sebastian spotted him, he smiled and Blaine sat down in one of the chairs.

"So the two of you talked?"

"It took a little while, but yeah." Sebastian looked down at Kurt. He ran a hand through the other boy's hair and seemed hesitant. Blaine could see the little spark of fear in his friend's eyes; after all, this was new, brand new. Sebastian's eyes were soft, though, if a little disbelieving. He glanced back up at Blaine momentarily. "Thank you. I didn't know I wanted this… No, I knew. I just wasn't paying attention." He shook his head. "Thank you."

"Next time you meet a boy and fall madly in love with him at the same time, maybe you should ask him out for coffee instead of asking him if he shops in the girl's department."

Sebastian stared at Blaine for a second and then rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I'll try and remember that."

* * *

A/N: I feel like it's been a while... hello all! Thank you for all of the prompts - I've gotten some ideas from them that I'm really looking forward to. ^_^ Updates will probably be pretty slow now that school is once more a thing that I have to put up with, so please bear with me; I promise I'm working hard on this and my other stories!

And this one was supposed to be funny, but then the feelings attacked and there's really nothing you can do when that happens. I really like this verse, though... let me know if you'd like to see more from it!

(Disclaimer: Glee belongs to Ryan Murphy and FOX. This is for entertainment purposes only and not for profit.)


	8. The Marrying Kind

The Marrying Kind

Summary: Kurt loves weddings and Sebastian hates them, but Kurt has a way of changing Sebastian's mind about things.

* * *

Kurt Hummel loved weddings. He loved the planning, the colors and careful coordination between every tiny element, and the magic of the event as a starting point for the rest of the couples' lives. His place in the fashion industry, though not focused on bridal wear or anything related, put him in contact with a lot of weddings, mostly those of friends in the office who had heard rumors of a younger Kurt who had almost single-handedly planned an affordable, beautiful wedding for his dad and step-mom his junior year of high school. His opinion on wedding-related details was revered around his workplace, and plenty of tearful brides and proud grooms had assured him that if his clothing line never got off the ground, he would definitely have a bright future in wedding planning.

Sebastian Smythe utterly despised weddings. They were the first step to divorce, in his opinion, and he groaned every time his boyfriend came home chattering about a coworker who'd just gotten engaged because that meant months of that enormous color-swatch binder, a table filled with ribbons and magazines and cake toppers, and almost certainly a wedding at the end of it all. He'd gotten lucky once and the entire thing had to be called off two months in thanks to some unfortunate photos involving a bridesmaid, but he couldn't count on that every time. It was an extreme annoyance and Sebastian wanted as little to do with it as possible.

Of course, when Kurt received an excited phone call from Rachel Berry about her engagement, he knew that he could kiss peaceful evenings at home good-bye for the foreseeable future. She'd chosen Kurt as her "man of honor," the title of which was often questioned by Kurt - "Honestly, Rachel, just call me your best man or something" - and so of course Kurt ended up doing most of the work. The entire planning period was filled with chaos and pain, thanks in no part to Sebastian's boyfriend and entirely to Berry's absolute need for perfection. She had no less than four nervous breakdowns, and all of them caused someone necessary to quit (the caterer, the DJ, the photographer, and the wedding cake baker, if Sebastian remembered correctly), almost sending Kurt into breakdowns of his own. When it got back to Sebastian that the diva had overturned a cake in her frustration over the incorrect filling - from a crying Kurt Hummel, who spent the rest of the day calling bakeries to see if anyone would be willing to do a last-minute job - he'd had a very long phone conversation with the bridezilla involving more than a little ugly language and more than a few furious promises of what would happen to her if she kept running his boyfriend into the ground.

Somehow everyone survived until the wedding, and miraculously Kurt and Rachel were still friends by the time she walked down the aisle, so Sebastian still had to go. At the very least the bride didn't seem to hold any ill-will towards him. Kurt was the happiest he'd been since his friend got engaged, so as weddings went, it wasn't that bad. The DJ knew what he was doing, the caterer worked around the vegetarian requirements expertly, and Sebastian danced with Kurt until they were both too exhausted to move. Sebastian collapsed into one of the chairs at their table, but Kurt wanted to talk to Rachel and wandered off.

Half an hour later, Kurt hadn't returned and Sebastian was getting bored. He went looking and found his boyfriend still talking to Rachel. She was squealing about something and it was annoying as hell, but before Sebastian could interrupt she wrapped Kurt in a tight hug.

"Oh, thank you thank you thank you! I can't even tell you how you've saved my life these past months! The wedding is perfect, and everything came together just right and…" Rachel gave him a smack of a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you!"

Kurt laughed. "Well, I couldn't leave you in charge of your own wedding – I remember high school."

There was more laughter and Sebastian was about to butt in and claim his boyfriend when Rachel's expression suddenly turned coy. "And when can I be expected to help plan _your_ wedding?"

Kurt's face froze for an instant and Sebastian saw him pull it into an approximation of a smile. He knew that expression – it was the face Kurt made when he wasn't really happy about something but he'd already accepted it. Sebastian frowned; he didn't understand the sudden change. "Rachel, I don't think that's going to happen."

"What? But you love him and I know he loves you! Did I ever tell you about that one time after we left the bakery -"

"Rachel. Rachel!" Kurt somehow managed to catch the bride's hands, which were waving wildly around with her dismay. "Nothing is wrong with our relationship; Sebastian just isn't interested in getting married. We've talked about it." And they had, once. The conversation hadn't lasted very long – Kurt brought it up and Sebastian had been very clear that he thought the entire concept was just setting people up for disaster. From that point on, any wedding talk was about someone else's.

Rachel seemed stricken and Sebastian felt a surge of annoyance. Who did she think she was, passing judgment on a personal decision between him and Kurt? "But Kurt… you want that. You've always wanted that."

"I love Sebastian. _He's_ what I want."

She still seemed skeptical. "And you're sure you're happy with this?"

"I'm sure." His smile didn't look very reassuringly happy.

That strained smile stayed with Sebastian longer than he was comfortable with. Kurt seemed fine when they danced again that evening and on the way home and the next two weeks after that, but Sebastian couldn't seem to let it go. Kurt was a big fan of talking about feelings. If he really wanted to get married that much, Sebastian was having a hard time understanding why he hadn't talked more about it. He wouldn't have put it past Kurt to propose to him, so why would he suffer in silence? Maybe it had been too dark and Sebastian made a mistake about Kurt's expression. Maybe it was something else that Rachel said. Sebastian convinced himself that nothing had changed – they didn't want to get married. That was the end of it.

He almost believed it, too, until he got home from the law office early one night and caught Kurt flipping idly through one of the bridal magazines that had taken up most of the kitchen table lately. It was clear from the large, plastic box on the table that he'd been in the middle of cleaning up the extra supplies from the room when he'd gotten distracted. That wasn't especially unusual, but the expression on Kurt's face was. Every so often his mouth would quirk up in a smile, which would slowly drop away after a second.

With a horrible jolt, Sebastian realized that Kurt was musing over things he thought he couldn't have.

Kurt noticed him in the doorway before he could pretend he hadn't seen. "Welcome home," he said warmly, flipping the magazine closed and placing it in the box. "Did you have a good day?"

"Kurt, did you… did you want to talk about, um…"

"Is something wrong?" Kurt was half-standing from his seat. The smile on his face was genuine, if a little concerned. Nothing about it was forced.

Sebastian hesitated. Had he been mistaken again? "Um, nothing." He gave Kurt another look, but his boyfriend cleared the table of the rest of the magazines and asked him what he wanted for dinner.

~0~0~0~

"Rachel, why did you get married?"

Ever since that afternoon – and if he was being honest, the wedding – Sebastian had been trying to figure out what it was about marriage that people found so… exciting. He hadn't come up with very much. He and Kurt were living together – wasn't that basically the same thing? Who needed all of the fanfare? He finally had to admit defeat and make a call, and even though he didn't like asking Rachel Berry for help, she was the person most likely to know where Kurt's fascination stemmed from and the only one whose number he could find at the apartment.

"Sebastian…? What the… it's two in the morning! I just got back from my honeymoon today, what are you…"

Sebastian ignored her indignation. "I need to know why you got married. It's important."

"Because I was in love? Why do you even need to know?"

"Just because you were in love? That's the only reason? Why go through all of the effort to have a wedding, then?"

Rachel sighed, clearly growing more frustrated. "I don't know what you're looking for from me, Sebastian. It's a wedding. People have been doing it for a while. Everyone else seems to understand."

"But why is it necessary? Why do people go through all of the trouble of fulfilling empty societal expectations when they could just live together?"

Sebastian could hear a soft creak in the background; Rachel must have been sitting back on the bed or a chair. "It's more than that. I guess there is that expectation that if you're dating someone for a while you're going to get married, and I know it's not what everyone wants, but it's another expression of how much you love someone. It was about trust, for me. I chose to trust someone else with my whole life and all of the things that aren't perfect about me."

Sebastian thought about that for a while in the silence on the phone. After a few moments, Rachel spoke up again. She sounded less annoyed, probably realizing that the strange call was more than just a whim. "Does that help?"

"Yes," Sebastian said, and he sounded incredibly unsure.

Sensing that, too, Rachel continued. "Just relax, okay? Like I said, it's not for everyone. No one's going to make you get married."

_No_, Sebastian thought to himself as he hung up the phone a few seconds later, _no one's going to make me get married. I don't have to get married. Nothing has to change._

Something was changing, though, by small, mostly unnoticed increments. Sebastian watched Kurt more closely; he found himself observing the more subtle aspects of their lives together, how they worked together. He learned that Kurt could read him like a book; Sebastian didn't have to say anything about having a bad day for Kurt to know about it, and he could sense Kurt's mood as soon as he was through the door. The morning wasn't complete unless Kurt straightened his tie. The entire atmosphere of the apartment changed when Kurt was nearing a deadline and running around, a chaotic tornado of designs and destruction; Sebastian was always roped into cleanup. Kurt made the best coffee but the worst puns. He was never late for work but Sebastian had to shove him out of the door for social events despite protests that he needed just a little more hairspray or that he wasn't sure his outfit coordinated correctly. He had a variety of laughs, and Sebastian could interpret every one of them.

Kurt was setting the table for takeout one night when neither of them felt like cooking when it occurred to Sebastian he wanted to marry the man. Weddings and ceremony and pomp could all suffer a long and agonizing death, but he wanted to tell Kurt that he trusted him with everything, because he did. He wanted to get married.

It took him a second to process the information, and Kurt gave his suddenly tense boyfriend a strange look, but Sebastian managed to keep the huge influx of emotion masked and under control. For the rest of the evening, distracted, he was consumed with one thought: _shit, what kind of ring does Kurt even want?_

Sebastian behaved strangely after that. He spent extra time at the law office, staying overtime almost every night and exhausted by the time he got back to the apartment. He was strangely private with his personal space and was extremely upset when he saw Kurt putting away some of his clothes in his dresser. He made phone calls to strange numbers that Kurt didn't recognize; whenever one of those numbers called the house he was quick to answer and ranted quietly about only calling him on his cell phone when he thought Kurt couldn't hear.

The entire situation was making Kurt incredibly nervous, and when Sebastian called Rachel again one afternoon, she was infuriated.  
"You have some nerve calling me like this, especially after the way you've been treating Kurt -"  
"Does Kurt like Tiffany's?"

"What kind of question is that? Stop avoiding the issue! You're treating Kurt like he shouldn't be allowed in your life and _I swear to God if this has anything to do with that phone call -_"

"So, um, he does like Tiffany's? He's always talking about the movie... You know what, I have a good feeling about this, I'll just get something here." He was about to hang up the phone when Rachel started screeching again, and experience taught him that hanging up on her in that state was asking for more drama than he had time to deal with.

Before he could try to break back into the conversation, Rachel cut herself off. "Wait. Did you say Tiffany's?" The screeching turned into squealing and Sebastian winced. "Oh my God _oh my God this is why you called me!_"

"Rachel, you can't tell him."

"Do you think he'll ask me to be his maid of honor? I mean, I can't imagine who else he'd ask, unless he wants Finn to be his best man, but there's no reason he couldn't have both, right?"

"_Rachel._"

She ended up staying on the phone with him the entire time, inserting opinions about various rings that she couldn't see. Sebastian decided on a simple band, the complete opposite of Rachel's suggestions.

It was a lot easier to evade Kurt's suspicion with Rachel's help. She dragged him off to lunches and breakfasts and shopping trips, refusing to take no for an answer. On the night of the proposal, she made sure that Kurt was out of the office on time despite a looming deadline.

Kurt said yes, of course, somewhere in between the crying and laughing, and the color-swatch binder made its reappearance the very next afternoon along with a veritable explosion of supplies. Sebastian was drawn into various debates about color and seating more often than he would have liked - "Kurt, I don't care if the centerpieces are blue or not, just show up and say 'I do'" - but he didn't regret it.

The next wedding Sebastian attended was more bearable than most. The food at the reception was delicious, and no one infuriated the baker beforehand so the wedding cake was magnificent. The seating was expertly handled and everyone there got along wonderfully, a real achievement considering the complicated history. The ceremony was beautiful in its simplicity and the vows were some of the best ever written. Sebastian might have been biased, though, since he was one of the grooms.

Just before they left the reception for the airport and their honeymoon, Sebastian's husband looped his arms around Sebastian's waist and smiled into the crook of his neck. "Want to get out of here?" The words were barely discernible, muttered against his skin. "I know how much you hate these things."

Sebastian chuckled and craned his head back to kiss Kurt on the temple. "It's not so bad. Did you see Finn trying to dance? Comedy gold." He felt Kurt's laugh more than heard it, and the arms around his waist tightened. He felt a hand toying with his wedding band.

"Just when I think I have you figured out, you pull out a ring." He didn't ask, but Sebastian could feel the question hanging in the air.

"I guess I just wanted you to be the one I came home to." He could feel Kurt smiling against his neck again before his husband kissed him on the cheek.

* * *

A/N: Hey look, I'm still alive! School has kept me pretty busy lately, but I'm still writing, promise! So I found this thing and I decided to finish it... I hope you guys like it. And that it's not too corny. Yup.

Also, if any of you are waiting on Tiny Prayers, I promise I'm working on the next chapter. It will be updated. It will. Thank you so much for your patience!

(Disclaimer: Glee belongs to FOX and Ryan Murphy. This story is meant for entertainment purposes only and not for profit.)


	9. Unwelcome Visitor

Unwelcome Visitor

Summary: Sebastian's had a long day, and a crisis in the apartment is about to make it longer. (Same 'verse as Unbearable Living Conditions)

* * *

Sebastian slammed the door of the apartment as he walked in, unconcerned with the way either his boyfriend or other roommate would protest because he'd had a really long fucking day and he was going to slam the door if he wanted to. For good measure, he left his backpack and shoes right in front of the door, too. All he wanted to do was find his boyfriend, convince him to abandon whatever important homework he was trying to finish, and drag him to the couch for some quality cuddling. Kurt was a fucking cuddle master, a skill that Sebastian did not know was necessary in a prospective boyfriend until he actually started dating the best in the business.

Depending on what homework assignment was most pressing, Sebastian expected to find Kurt with papers and books sprawled all throughout their tiny living room or huddled behind a computer screen on his bed in his even smaller room. What Sebastian did not expect was to walk into the kitchen and living room area to find Kurt standing on the counter, wielding a heavy pot like a baseball bat.

The pot was swung in his direction as soon as he walked into Kurt's line of vision, and Sebastian raised his hands on instinct in the universal sign of surrender. Kurt's tense position from the cabinets slumped as he realized that the intruder was just his boyfriend. Instantly, Sebastian's mind was filled with all kinds of theories about break-ins and mass-murderers while Kurt had clearly been at the apartment alone, and his bad day became impossibly worse as he considered all of the late-night crime show scenarios he could have walked in to find.

"What –"

"I found a _mouse_ in our _kitchen_."

Sebastian took a second to let the words sink in, and then another to clear out obviously unnecessary fear that had been taking over. "You found… and your solution is to wave a pot around at everyone who walks through the door? You couldn't tell that I wasn't a mouse?"

Kurt ignored Sebastian's logic in favor of scanning the floors. "I didn't see where he ran. He could be anywhere by now."

The relief of not having to confront a serial killer combined with the particular joy of seeing Kurt off of his game (which pretty much never happened, because Sebastian _never_ won any of their arguments) made him feel remarkably better, and Sebastian smirked, enjoying the unusual display of weakness. "What happened to all that talk last week about you being fearless and taking and taking New York by storm? After that class with that one professor who always gives you hell? Are small, furry animals the exception, then?"

"Shut up, Sebastian, you didn't see it. It's a filthy little creature and it could be anywhere." Sebastian laughed at the sudden pair of crazy-eyes Kurt was sporting, which only earned him a glare from the boy. "Right, laugh. When you're on your deathbed because some diseased animal bit you _in your own home_, do not expect me to take care of you. I will laugh at you and throw a mouse trap at your face."

Sebastian shook his head and sniggered. "See babe, this is why you need a man around the house, to take care of all the things you're just too delicate to handle." He walked to the other side of the kitchen where a broom was leaning against the wall. Just give me a minute, I'll –" Sebastian cut off his own sentence, freezing in place and looking slowly down at the floor in front of him.

"What is it?" Kurt shifted uneasily as his boyfriend examined the floor.

A pair of beady, black eyes set into a small, furry face regarded him seriously, attached to the tiny animal that was sitting next to the foot it had just run over. There was half a second of incomprehension before Sebastian realized what he was looking at.

"Holy _shit_, it's a fucking _mouse!_" Sebastian made a mad scramble for the kitchen counter, almost knocking his boyfriend over in the struggle until they were both precariously perched on a space that was much too small to accommodate them. There were a few moments of tense silence as they both watched the unwelcome visitor make a break for the far wall. Then Sebastian made the mistake of looking over at Kurt.

His boyfriend's grin was positively wicked. "You're absolutely right, _sweetheart_," Kurt cooed at him, his voice _dripping_ with delighted sarcasm. "I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have a man like you here to panic the minute a small, furry animal touched him. That was the manliest shriek of terror I've ever heard."

"Shut up and give me a weapon," Sebastian muttered, crossing his arms and sulking.

When Blaine got home from his last class an hour later, he was confronted with a heavy pot and a (pathetically small, by comparison) wooden spoon waving in his face. His roommates were huddled together on the kitchen counter. There was evidence of things having been thrown (and a few of them having been broken in the process) because, as he finally managed to pry from them, they'd seen a _mouse_. The clearly weighty revelation was met with a shrug from Blaine, because yeah, they lived in an old apartment in New York. Mice happened sometimes. Not really sure what to do for them besides wish them luck with their struggle and warn them not to use the coffeemaker as ammo under pain of death, Blaine went to his bedroom, where he wondered if it would be considered animal cruelty to bring a cat into the chaos of their apartment.

* * *

A/N: Guess who's finally finished with finals! Sorry for such a long hiatus, guys, and thank you for being so amazingly patient with me; it was a tough semester, but it's finally over!

Hopefully, now that I have more free time I'll be able to update much faster, so if you're following Tiny Prayers, I'll be working on the next chapter. ^_^ And of course there will be more here, and possibly from this 'verse so I hope you like them. :D Thanks again for your patience, and thanks for reading!

(Disclaimer: Glee belongs to FOX and Ryan Murphy. This story is for entertainment purposes only and not for profit.)


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